Extraordinary
by Iellix
Summary: Yuffie does some thinking about what Squall says to her and what she really sees in herself. She's not so bad as he seems to make her think, she discovers. And that sort of confidence is what Squall had wanted to see in her all along. Squffie, songfics.
1. Extraordinary

I'm kind of in a rut right now for everything else, but I heard this song in a movie and I decided that it fit Yuffies' thinking after maybe Squall had insulted her one time too many. Not really fluffy or even fuzzy, but I thought it would work. Maybe I'll add more later on but for now it's a oneshot.

Disclaimer: I am such a loser. I'm using characters from Squaresoft, and a song from Liz Phair. Woohoo, go me! ::badly dancing::

0…0…0…0…0

_You think that I go home at night,_

_Take off my clothes,_

_Turn out the light._

_But I burn letters that I write_

_To you _

_To make you love me._

He was being mean to me again. I have no idea why I love him so much, I just do. I have the cliché picture of him in my underwear drawer… I snapped it candid while he was talking to Sora one night. He's just standing there in that frame looking criminally attractive with his hair over his eyes and holding that sword tip-down at his feet. Mm…

But he's mean to me! He's insulting me, calling me weak! How dare he? I can do things that he can't! Hmph.

I wish I could make him love me. Or at least want me. Why else in the world would I traipse around a town with no sunlight wearing shorts and a halter top? I want him to notice me! I try to start speeches or letters or something to him but I never get passed, "Dammit, I love you!" It seems I can never really get anything more eloquent than that. Stupid emotions.

_Yea, I drive naked through the park_

_Run the stop sign in the park_

_Sit in the street,_

_Yell out my heart._

_To make…_

_To make you love me._

What doesn't he see in me, huh? What's not to like about me? Can I really be childish and weak and wimpy and whiny and too perky and pesky and… _childish?_ I hate that word which is probably why he insists on calling me it all the time. Aerith is the only one with a full-length mirror so I sneak across to her room to take a look.

Okay, I've been cleaner.

I need a haircut.

My socks are ripped.

But I mean… under it all! I know I'm cute, dammit! Everyone tells me that I am except for Squall, but I _have_ caught him staring at me when I'm clean. I'm not all that bad, really! I mean if I showered thoroughly more than once a week instead of just hosing off in between Heartless battles and maybe got some new socks and possibly bushed my hair on a more than monthly basis. I'm cute. I turn around and try to get a decent gander at my back, which only works halfway in each direction but two halves separately is better than nothing.

I strike a pose at the mirror, like I used to see Tifa do way back when.

Hips to the side.

Hand on the hip.

Head tilted.

Eyes are half closed.

Yea… this works.

_I am extraordinary,_

_If you ever get to know me._

_I am extraordinary!_

_I am just your ordinary_

_Average everyday sane psycho,_

_Supergoddess_

_Average everyday sane psycho._

Ah-hah! There it is. Yea. He's always telling me that I'm so useless. But I just saved _his_ butt because he was slow! So I can't be weak—I singlehandedly killed a swarm of Wyverns! So what if I had a minor concussion and he carried me to see Aerith? It's not like the Wyverns did it—I was doing my victory dance and fell off the balcony. It was a stupid act, but it doesn't make me stupid.

Maybe he doesn't really think all those things about me. How can he, really? We're a team! I twirl a shuriken in my fingers and toss it into the air and catch it in my teeth. Lulls in Heartless activity have produced several useless talents in me.

I don't know why he thinks I'm so worthless. It isn't really true. Just because I sometimes need help doesn't mean I'm weak. It's like him—he's so cold and mean to me, sometimes downright cruel. But I think he's just afraid of his feelings. He can't really be that cruel in his heart. There's a nice guy in there somewhere, I just have to dig it out.

_You may not believe in me,_

_But I believe in you._

_So I still take the trash out—_

_Does that make me too normal for you?_

I'll make him love me one of these days. He already loves me, maybe, just won't admit it. Once he gets to know me really well, sees parts of me that I keep to myself—not physically, of course, I'll wait for at least two weeks before I go that far—he might actually start being nicer around me. He'll find out I'm stronger than I usually act. I'm only a pest to him because I wanna know what he's moping about. I wanna know so I can help. He doesn't want it right now but he'll be happy when I've helped him.

Still… there are things that I see in myself that he doesn't see in me. There are things that other people see in me that he doesn't see in me. I'm strong. I'm smart. I'm more grown-up than I like to act, because a little immaturity once in a while can be refreshing—and necessary to maintain sanity.

I'm a _ninja._ I'm cool and calm and stealthy and sneaky, and I'm smart and I'm strong!

So _what_ if I can fall up the stairs?

So _what_ if I get hurt doing silly things?

_And so shoot me_ if I happen to be _interested_ in the wellbeing of Squall Leonhart, because he obviously doesn't care enough about himself to actually give a shit!

_So dig a little deeper cause_

_You still don't get it yet._

_See me lickin' my lips,_

_Need a primitive fix,_

_And I'll make,_

_I'll make you love me._

I'm still staring in this silly mirror but from the time I walked in, my appearance has changed a bit. I'm cleaner and my socks aren't ripped anymore. I've gotten a bit bigger, filled out almost. Like I can actually defend myself and not look like a twig in a hurricane when I got into battle. Plus I'm just plain adorable.

Not that _I've_ actually changed. I'm just seeing my reflection differently.

So what if he insists on insulting me and trying to make me feel bad? I know it's not true, so why do I keep believing it whenever he says it?

Duh… because I love him. If it would make him love me back, I think I'd believe almost anything he told me, but I have to draw the line somewhere and this is it.

He can't keep telling me all these things and making me feel horrible. I won't allow it. I'm better than he thinks I am and he'll see it even if I have to _force_ him to.

I'll also make him love me.

But I think first I'll make him see what I really am, instead of just crying and running away when he insults me.

_I am extraordinary,_

_If you ever get to know me._

_I am extraordinary!_

_I am just your ordinary_

_Average everyday sane psycho,_

_Supergoddess_

_Average everyday sane psycho._

And on top of that, I'm not about to let him boss me around so much anymore either! Sometimes his battle tactics don't work—like today with the Wyverns. What I had suggested would have worked, and I wouldn't have had to save him and do my victory dance on the balcony and have a concussion.

No more Miss Nice Guy for me! No more Miss Scaredy I'll-Let-You-Insult-Me-All-You-Want. And I'm not gonna let him see me crying anymore.

Okay, so I'm not a blonde sex kitten bimbo, but I'm not ugly and I can _definitely_ bend in ways he would find attractive. He's not just gonna sit there and ignore me anymore, I'm gonna prove to him that I'm… I'm awesome!

No, I'm fucking _extraordinary!_

Yea, that's it! I'm extraordinary and nobody can stop me! Not even the man I happen to be obsessively in love with.

So I take a few steps away from the mirror and wink at myself for good luck. Egotistical? Yea. But better to do it and not need it, right? I might not need it now though… I have confidence.

After all—I'm extraordinary.

_See me jump through hoops for you_

_You stand there watching me perform._

_What exactly do you do?_

_Have you ever thought it's you that's boring?_

_Who the hell are you?_

I'm cool and confident. I feel better, too, and I'm walking tall. If Squall doesn't see what's really here in me, then I'm gonna _make_ him see it! And I've just gotta do the movie-ending thing and tell him exactly what I think!

I mean besides "I love you." I don't think that'll flow here anyway.

But he's gonna know eventually, and he'll be glad to know. Because by then he'll know that I'm better than he ever thought that I was.

Yea, baby, I'm on a roll here!

And I'm in luck. He's in our room, sitting on the bed and polishing the Gunblade with an old rag.

And he's shirtless.

Sexy.

But I am, too.

_I am extraordinary,_

_If you ever get to know me._

_I am extraordinary!_

_I am just your ordinary_

_Average everyday sane psycho,_

_Supergoddess_

_Average everyday sane psycho._

Suddenly I feel very insecure. But for a few minutes I take advantage of the fact that he is both topless and unaware of my presence and stare at the way his muscles flex as he goes about polishing.

If I wasn't so composed I think I'd be drooling.

But I'll tell him that I'm not gonna be a little wimp anymore. I'm gonna show my true colors, whether he likes it or not!

_Average everyday sane psycho,_

_Supergoddess_

_Average everyday sane psycho._

_Average everyday sane psycho,_

_Supergoddess_

_Average everyday sane psycho._

Here it goes. I finally uproot my feet and stop staring at his chest and his abs and his arms and his _chest,_ my God, he's so fuckin' sexy.

Focus, Yuffie, focus.

I stroll right across the room and stand in front of him.

He's still polishing that stupid sword and he hasn't noticed me. It's like the sword means more to him than I do. I feel like saying, "Look at how cute I am! Your sword can't look this good, I bet!" But I don't.

"Hey, _Squall!"_ I call him the forbidden name out of spite. He looks up at me, squints his eyes, and goes back to polishing.

Stupid, stupid man! But I love him anyway.

"I said _hey!"_ Now I give him a shove backwards but not too hard because I know the Gunblade is sharp and I don't want either of us to get hurt because I'm being rash right now.

He looks up this time and stops polishing and those gorgeous blue eyes take my breath away, just like they always do.

"I'm extraordinary!"

Just like that.

And I walk out, real calm like. Confident.

I'm being a little cocky right now but I feel really damned good about what I've done. So I'll be as cocky as I want to.

Because I can.

"I'm extraordinary!"

_Average everyday sane psycho._

0…0…0…0…0

A oneshot done in an hour. Actually, for a spur of the moment thing, I think it turned out fairly well. I might add more to this, like I said, but then again, I might not. We'll see. Please review, and I'll be so happy.

After all—I'm extraordinary, too!

Think I listened to the song one too many times.

Work on UB is in progress, but really slow. I'm working on it I swear!


	2. She

Why do I bother fighting it? I really, truly want to write for UB now, but my muse wants me to write more with this. So who am I to argue? I might as well just add more to this fic, I mean you gotta write what the muse says write, right? It might help me get over my block, and if not, then it's a bit of fluff for me to write since I'm not writing any for UB yet.

Disclaimer: At the last second I decided to make this chapter a songfic, as well. The song is "She" by Green Day. We all know who the characters rightfully belong to… pay no attention to the hostages behind the curtain…

0…0…0…0…0

Squall was a bit taken aback by what Yuffie had just done. He wasn't upset or angry or embarrassed or anything by it. She'd just told him what was on her mind—the good, the bad, the ugly, all in just one word. He… liked it.

He'd never seen her being so forceful like that to anything without the Heartless emblem. He knew mostly what she was probably upset about—he'd insulted her, again. It was after she'd gone along with his battle plan against a flock of Wyverns, despite the fact that she didn't really want to go along with it. They had gotten into a lot of trouble with it, and when he was surrounded by spiraling, kicking airborne Heartless, Yuffie had used her stealth and her speed to cut the monsters down where he hadn't had much of a chance.

Then she did that silly victory dance and fell off the wall and had a concussion.

So he'd called her weak.

As soon as he did it he almost felt bad about it, from the way she looked at him with those big sad eyes full of hurt and tears that she refused to let fall. He was always insulting her, but he did it to toughen her up. She was so emotional all the time, and she would do anything that he told her to—he'd fudged his tactics with the Wyverns to see if she would object to him, which she did for a moment, but then went along with his plans.

_)( She…_

_She screams in silence._

_A sullen silence penetrating through her mind._

_Waiting_

_For a sign._

_To smash the silence with the brick of self-control. )(_

When she ran off after being healed, he figured that she would go and cry again, and then apologize to him for being so ornery—just like always. Whenever she did that, it drove him crazy. He wanted her to, just once, stand up for herself, and tell him to his face that he was wrong about something.

He also wanted her to get out of his personal life. For now.

He didn't want a woman who wouldn't stand up for herself.

But something had happened in Aerith's room, and she had come back full force and told him that she was extraordinary. On top of that, when he had initially ignored her, she swatted him and yelled to get his attention. It was so unlike Yuffie. Whatever happened there had given her a temporary burst of confidence—enough to confront him like that.

He couldn't help it—he buried his face in his hands and laughed harder than he had in a long time, keeping as quiet as possible. He couldn't help it. It wasn't even all that funny but it was almost a relieved laughter. She'd stood up for herself, even if just for a minute, and that's what he wanted her to do.

_)( Are you locked up in a world_

_That's been planned out for you?_

_Are you feeling like a social tool without a use?_

_Scream at me_

_Until my ears bleed._

_I'm taking heed just for you. )(_

Finally, finally. That's all he wanted from her. She always tried to do things to please him, training in the Waterway at all hours and digging into his head to get his ideas. She did whatever he told her to do. She followed him like a little lost puppy. Some days he thought that if he were to walk off the edge of a building, she would follow faithfully.

He had done a lot to help her. Since she was a little girl, scared and helpless in Hollow Bastian nine years ago when their own home worlds had been destroyed, he'd been with her. He partially raised her, partially honed her training. Even then, she'd followed him, did whatever he told her. Sometimes he would tell her to do the silliest and most menial tasks that he _knew_ that she hated doing, just to make her refuse.

But she never had.

He wanted her to be stronger—not physically, of course, she was already mostly at her maximum capacity for that. Her strength lay not in her physical strength but in the fact that she was stealthy and agile. He just wanted her to refuse to do something—just once in her life. Tell him no. Tell him to go do it himself. Slap him.

They did argue quite a lot, though. She would always just quit early for crying or because he told her to back off, or go away, or to let him be. She never actually stayed to finish an argument the whole way through, which confused him, because whenever she argued with somebody else, she would win every time, since she didn't give up.

But she gave for him. Probably because she was more than just blatantly smitten with him. Still, that was no reason to just sit there and do whatever he asked her to do without arguing, or quitting early in an argument, just for him.

He wanted her to defend herself against him.

He wanted her to yell at him and tell him that he was being a jackass.

Then maybe he'd like her more. Admittedly, but only to himself, seeing her forceful side was something of a thrill to him. She _definitely_ had it in her. It was a start.

_)(She…_

_She's figured out._

_That all her doubts were someone else's point of view._

_Walking_

_Up this time,_

_To smash the silence with the brick of self-control. )(_

She was actually starting to believe all of the things he told her—that she was weak and childish and silly and a pest. That nearly made him stop the insulting all together, just because perhaps she wasn't cut out for it. But then one day he had seen her stand up to a man who must have weighed twice what she did, simply because he was picking on her and calling her the same things that he himself did. And she stood up to it and told him, to his face, that he was wrong.

Then she punched him and took his hot dog and walked away.

_That_ was the Yuffie he wanted.

She _must_ have figured out that it wasn't true at all. Albeit she was a little childish sometimes, just to make someone laugh. And she was pesky, but it was only because she cared about him enough to _pester him to the very edge of his sanity _just to see if she could help him with his problem.

Of course he was probably going to have to figure out a way to communicate to her, the way that he normally would, that he was pleased with what she had done. For the most part he did agree with what she'd said. She was… extraordinary. In a lot of ways. In good ways and in bad, but he liked the mix. In her it worked.

Whatever pep talk Aerith had given her or whatever she'd told herself or whatever she had seen or heard or said in that room had made the forceful side of her come out, and he truly liked it. It was a small step towards what he had wanted her to do all along—to be strong.

_)(Are you locked up in a world_

_That's been planned out for you?_

_Are you feeling like a social tool without a use?_

_Scream at me_

_Until my ears bleed._

_I'm taking heed just for you. )(_

It was a relief to him to know that he had finally made Yuffie stand up and tell him, in her own way, that he was wrong for saying these things. All these years of telling her what he himself knew was untrue, and of yelling at her and being hard on her and kicking that poor little puppy of a person to toughen her up… it had all paid off.

He hoped she'd make it a habit.

He knew that euphoric look she had when she walked out of the room, having told him that she was extraordinary when she obviously believed that he thought the opposite. It was the look of relief and a long-needed victory. She would probably face him with more confidence the next time they met up, which was perfect for him.

Speaking of which—he wanted to see that sparkle in her eyes again. It was soothing to him to know that he had finally done something right with her. She'd been forceful and it was wonderful. He could never have a woman who didn't stand up—

_Him?_ Having Yuffie? The thought often enough crossed his mind, but never really seriously. He knew that she had the biggest schoolgirl crush on him, and he thought once or twice of returning her affections, but he didn't want to cushion her or cradle her before he knew that she would be able to be strong.

He shook his head and pulled his shirt on. Not Yuffie. If she really found out the person he was, she'd probably run in the other direction screaming. Or worse, she'd laugh at him for being such a wimp. Then she'd know for a fact that she was stronger than him in many ways.

He'd done what he had to do with her. He'd done and said things that had made her cry for years and years, so that she would be able to stand up to anybody. Over the years he had seen her get more and more confident with confrontation with everybody else, because she had learned to let most comments slide right off of her, to take no notice of names, which were most people's primary weapon.

She had finally stood up to him, after all this time. She'd stood up to the one person she never stood up to before. She came outright and said so many things with those two little words. The words, her poise, the way she said it—it all added up to a confidence that he had never seen in her before and he was glad that she had finally found it.

_)(Are you locked up in a world_

_That's been planned out for you?_

_Are you feeling like a social tool without a use?_

_Scream at me_

_Until my ears bleed._

_I'm taking heed just for you. )(_

He stepped out of the room to look for Yuffie. He did not have to go far, since she was perched out on the ledge right outside the hotel that overlooked the center of the Second District. The Heartless had receded once again, but still she kept her weapons with her, as did he. They could never be too prepared.

He walked up behind her, careful to make as much sound as possible with his boots on the stone ground. He wanted her to know that he was there. He took his place behind her and off to the right, far enough away so that neither could feel the others' heat, and close enough so that they could touch.

For a while they just stood there, each looking at the center of the District, just now coming back to life after the people had been temporarily hidden. She still had that starry-eyed look, and she was still holding herself taller than usual. She probably felt pretty damned good about what she had done, and he didn't blame her at all. He would probably feel good standing up to someone like him, too.

After hesitation, he laid a heavy hand on her shoulder. She turned slowly, and looked at the hand for a long moment, before following the arm up to him and looking at him in the eyes. He closed his eyes and half nodded, half bowed his head to her.

Then he took his hand away.

And turned around.

And walked off.

0…0…0…0…0

I think this is really what I needed! I am so on a roll right now! And for once it isn't a _toilet paper roll!_ Yuk, yuk, yuk. Anyway, I would appreciate reviews. There will be another chapter to this one coming soon, and hopefully there will be some kissing or at least some fuzziness coming into the story soon. I have a pretty good idea for the next chapter, so look for it when I post it.

Peeze review.

For me.

For Squall and Yuffie and all that is Squffieness.


	3. Welcome to My Life

I don't have any idea what about this story appeals so much to my muse but once I find out, I'll apply it straight away to UB so I can get that next chapter up. Until then, however, I will just work on this story.

Disclaimer: From now on, I shall just disclaim the songs since I doubt there is anybody out there who does not yet grasp that I do not own the KH Glee Club and characters therein. Nor do I own Simple Plans' "Welcome to My Life."

0…0…0…0…0

_(()) Do you ever feel like breaking down?_

_Do you ever feel out of place?_

_Like somehow you just don't belong_

_And no one understands you. (())_

Yuffie was walking on clouds. She had been ever since she had confronted Squall, and had told him exactly what was on her mind. That gave her enough of a high as it was, but then he came outside and, in his own Squallish way, told her that he approved of it, and that he was glad she had done it. She didn't have the other half of the comparison, but she was pretty sure this feeling was better than sex.

But she really wanted to tell someone what she had done! This was a major accomplishment for her, and she wanted to tell _someone_ about it, but unfortunately there were precious few people in Traverse that tolerated her, and only two that actually liked her. And of those two people, neither would really understand why she was so happy about it. So it dampened her spirits quite a bit.

She didn't really like being here. The only reason she stayed—why anyone them stayed—was because the people had no means to defend themselves against the Heartless attacking. The other worlds, save for Hollow Bastion, had a number of people who were capable of repelling the Heartless for the most part. So they stayed to defend them, but for all she cared, they could all die from the Heartless.

Unfortunately she was the only one who felt that way.

So she had to stay here and fight for people that she didn't even like, alongside a man who she was hopelessly in love with and did not like her back.

_(()) Do you ever want to run away?_

_Do you lock yourself in your room?_

_With the radio on, turned up so loud_

_That no one hears you screaming. (())_

She went back to the room she shared with Squall, dragging her feet the whole way. He would probably be in their room, sitting at the edge of the bed like he always was, looking unbelievably hot no matter what he was doing, even if he was cleaning his toenails with a shrimp fork.

He was already wearing his pajamas and gingerly hurling his clothes into the hamper in the closet.

"It's about time you came back." He didn't look at her as he spoke.

"What the hell do you care?" She snapped back, too annoyed to be polite. He turned around and gave her a funny look, and she sighed. "Look, I was just… thinking. And it wasn't the good kind of thinking, all right? I'm in a bad mood now, so don't bother me." She shed her clothing on the way to the bed where she had shed her pajamas that morning and plopped on the bed.

"Complain, complain," he snorted. "That's all you ever do. Why is that?"

"What do you _mean,_ all I ever do is _complain?"_ She growled. "I do not! I've never been the whiny type!"

"You're always begging Aerith and Cid to leave. That counts as complaining," he said, sitting on the edge of the bed.

She turned all the way around so she could look at him. "No it doesn't! I hate it here! I hate it that nobody understands me—_especially_ you!"

"Don't give me that teenage melancholy 'nobody understands me' crap. Trust me, you aren't the only person to have gone through what you've gone through, so stop complaining, all right?"

"Do you have _any_ idea what it's like to be me?" She hissed. "Do you know _anything at all_ about what I've been through?"

"You've been through exactly what I've been through," he said nonchalantly. "There's nothing that you've seen that I haven't seen, too. I just don't let it get to me, that's all."

"We came from different worlds and we saw different things!" She insisted. "And on top of all that, I was just a little kid! I saw my parents die! I saw my friends and everybody I loved _die_ from the Heartless! You might not care because you're so rock-hard and disciplined but I was a scared little seven year old girl. One minute my biggest concern was a mud fight, and the next thing I knew, there was a mass grave all around me!"

"Aerith and Cid survived," he said in the same slightly condescending tone of voice. "Nobody I know of survived the attack on my world."

_(()) No, you don't know what it's like,_

_When nothing feels all right._

_No, you don't know what it's like_

_To be like me._

"Stop trying to trump me, _Squall,"_ she snapped. "For my age I've seen and done more than I care to. And yes, I _am_ pitying myself but that's just because if I didn't then nobody else would because _nobody likes me,_ especially you!"

"I'm not _trying_ to trump you. I'm just saying that I've seen and done everything that you have. Your problems aren't as unique as you think they are."

Yuffie sighed heavily. "Do you remember when you were little? I mean when you were like eight years old? Can you remember that far back?"

"Yea, I can. I haven't blocked out every memory you know," he said.

"Do you remember the things you did when you were that young?"

"I was in school. I teased girls. I played with bugs. Anything that normal boys did."

"Well when _I_ was eight years old, I was using my fighting skills to the best of my ability to defend Hollow Bastion against the Heartless meanwhile trying to help Aerith with healing the people who were attacked and helping Cid dig the mass graves that we buried the victims in."

That comment did make Squall pause to think. He thought back to himself at that age. And at nine and ten years old. He was just a carefree, clumsy little kid learning his weaponry skills, teasing girls, keeping enormous bugs for pets, leaning math skills that turned out to be totally useless. When the Heartless attacked Balamb when he was sixteen years old, he thought it was unfair for him. Most boys of sixteen were worried about facial hair, acne, impressing girls, and their penis size.

But Yuffie was right—at sixteen she was now the same age that he had been when the first Heartless had attacked his world. At that time he had been clueless as to what to do about them. At the same age, Yuffie was an efficient fighter against them and had been working on it for years and years.

"You see?" She said softly. She did not have the heart to be cocky about winning this argument. It was not that sort of a win.

"People were with you," he said slowly.

"Huh?"

"People you know… people you love. They came with you. Aerith and Cid were there with you."

Yuffie glared at him. He kept coming back to that. But when everything she knew had been destroyed, Aerith and Cid had survived and were left to take care of her. But Aerith was thirteen years old and just as scared as she was; Cid, at that time, had been a disgusting old drunk with a cigarette perpetually jammed in his teeth.

"They couldn't take care of me any better than I could have taken care of myself!" She protested. "You did a better job than anyone else taking care of me!" A few stray tears started slipping out. She quickly swiveled to hide them in her hands.

Squall merely sat where he was, watching her. Again she had a point, but he couldn't help but think that she had been a little more fortunate than he was nine years ago, considering the circumstances. Still… that image came to mind of a little eight-year-old Yuffie, scared and skinny and filthy, hiding as silently as she could in a secret cupboard behind a bookshelf, where he had hidden her, during a Heartless attack.

_(()) To be hurt,_

_To be lost,_

_To be left out in the dark._

_To be kicked_

_When you're down,_

_To feel like you've been pushed around._

_To be on the edge of breaking down,_

_And no one's there to save you._

_No, you don't know what it's like._

_Welcome to my life. (())_

"You were a lot nicer to me at first than Cid was because he was trying to get over the drinking and the smoking and he was a real hell animal to be around," she sniffled, her voice slightly croaking. "And Aerith was trying to be a good pseudo-mom for me, but she was still young, too." She wiped her eyes on her face.

"They're good with you now," he said.

"That's only because I'm older and I don't need as much as I did when I was little. When…" she breathed shakily, "when I was left alone with Aerith or Cid, I would used to just run off and try to find you, because you didn't seem to hate me as much. Remember all those times I wandered into you when you were off by yourself? I wanted to be with you because you didn't hate me."

Again Squall stayed quiet and just listened. He really didn't like that Yuffie had always invaded the little privacy that he got at that age, but still, being around her that much had helped him to toughen her up.

"And then all of a sudden you were cold-hearted. You didn't like me at all. You called me names and you were mean to me and whenever I asked if I could come with you, you just said, 'Whatever' and walked away like you didn't even know that I was there! I was just a little girl! I was ten years old, what the hell did I know why you were acting this way? Until then you'd been my favorite person in the world! In that stupid little tiny world we lived in. Then suddenly I was a pest, I was obnoxious. You didn't want me around."

Yuffie sat down and cried. Just cried right there in front of him. Her face was buried in her hands and she made as little noise as possible, just a few squeaky sounds every now and then. But she stayed exactly where she was and refused to move. This discussion was not over yet, she decided. She would cry herself tearless and then continue.

Meanwhile, Squall watched her. Instead of seeing Yuffie as she had become, the Greatest Female Ninja Ever, stealthy and quick, witty, and much smarter than she let on, he saw Yuffie as she once was, scared little ten year old girl, terrified of this new world and the way things had turned out, and suddenly one day had lost the one person who had shown her kindness.

Suddenly he felt a pang of regret at being so hard on her for all these years. All he had wanted to do was to help her, but he wanted to toughen her up so that she would be able to stand up to any Heartless threat, which he had done. He was certain that if the opportunity arose, she would confront Ansem and win. But he had, for so long, been the one person she believed liked her. He could see how, in a child's mind, he had abandoned her.

"You were _down fucking right cruel to me!" _She screamed, invading his personal space and getting right up into his face. "How could you do that? I loved you, dammit! I trusted you above everyone else! You were the one person who I could screw up around and you wouldn't scream at me, you would just help me get it right! Aerith tried to turn me into her ideal of a girl and Cid just wanted someone to carry his golf clubs but _you_ taught me how to fight and you made sure that I could defend myself against the Heartless!" She was panting and sweating hard by now. "I'm… I'm grateful for it, I really am," she said quietly. "But you _still_ didn't have to be so cruel to me!" She screamed.

"Are you finished venting, Yuffie?" Squall started to get up as he finished his question but the long on Yuffies' face made him sit back down again.

"All I wanted ever since then was for you to like me again," she said. "And it's the worst-kept secret of all the worlds that I'm in love with you. If I can't make you love me, then at least I want you to _like_ me. I want to be friends again—or were we ever friends in the first place?"

There was a long pause as Squall looked quite pensive. The silence grew bigger and bigger until it completely overwhelmed the room, and Yuffie looked down at her feet sadly.

"I guess we weren't," she said softly. "I guess I jumped to conclusions too easily. You aren't friends with anyone, are you? You just hide away in your little shell of silence and the occasional 'whatever' and those insults you save special for me. I guess you've forgotten what it's like to have friends, haven't you?"

_"Stop it, Yuffie!"_ He yelled. "Just _stop talking!"_ He breathed heavily for a second, as if he needed to catch his wind. It sounded to Yuffie almost as if he was trying to keep himself from crying. "Stop making assumptions that you know nothing about! You have _no idea_ what happened to me!"

"That's because you never _talk to me,"_ she hissed back. "Maybe if you _told_ me stuff every once in a while I could be less of a pest—have you ever thought about that?"

_(()) Do you wanna be somebody else?_

_Are you sick of feeling so left out?_

_Are you desperate to find something more,_

_Before your life is over? (())_

"I lost everything," he said quietly, in a smooth and venomous sort of voice. "Everybody I had ever loved and everybody I had ever known. I would settle now for finding somebody that I hated, just to know that I was not alone and that _somebody_ had been saved."

Instead of trying to reply this time, Yuffie just sat there and listened to him talk. Maybe he needed it.

"They're all dead because of me, you know. It's my fault that I wasn't strong enough to save them."

"You live under the illusion that you have to save and protect everybody," she told him. "Did you ever think that maybe you survived because you were strong enough to fend off the monsters long enough to get to a ship and leave? Maybe nobody else was strong enough."

"And what about _her?"_ He asked. "Are you saying that _she_ deserved to die?"

"No, Squall, I—"

"And stop using that name, I hate that name!"

Yuffie winced.

"You have no idea what it's like watching all those people die! You just have no idea! You can't say were so much the same because we both lost our homes—you were too young to remember the gory details and the horrors and the pain! You were just a little kid! I remember everything that happened!"

"And how does that make you so much worse off than me, huh? At least you _can_ remember the people you lost! You can remember your world before it was gone. You have those memories! I don't! I only know what Aerith and Cid have told me, and I don't remember my parents and I don't remember my friends and I don't even remember the house where I lived!"

_(()) Are you stuck inside a world you hate?_

_Are you sick of everyone around?_

_With big fake smiles and stupid lies,_

_While deep inside, you're bleeding. (())_

"So you're saying I should be _glad_ that I remember what I lost?" He asked, looking at her with a look that pretty much said he thought that she was the stupidest human being alive.

"Yea, actually, I am saying that," she said. "You remember your friends. I was too young really to _have_ that many."

"It hurts to remember. It was all my fault."

"Stop saying that, you idiot!" She yelled. "It wasn't your _fault._ It wasn't anybody's _fault_ except for the Heartless! You didn't do anything except for try to help—wouldn't you have felt infinitely worse if you hadn't fought at all and just sort of… ran away with your tail between your legs?"

To that he had no answer.

"Nobody ended up here because they wanted to, Squall. We are not alone. Everybody here lost somebody, or everybody, to the Heartless. Aerith doesn't wanna be here, you and I don't, certainly the people we keep _defending_ don't wanna be here."

"Everybody here at least has someone else. I am completely and totally alone."

_(()) No, you don't know what it's like_

_When nothing feels all right._

_You don't know what it's like_

_To be like me._

_(()) To be hurt,_

_To be lost,_

_To be left out in the dark._

_To be kicked_

_When you're down,_

_To feel like you've been pushed around._

_To be on the edge of breaking down,_

_And no one's there to save you._

_No, you don't know what it's like._

_Welcome to my life. (())_

"All right, you yelled at me already once for melancholy, now I'm gonna yell at you. _Stop with the dramatics already!"_ She snapped. "You're not alone. Whether or not you want to accept it, there are people here who love you and care about you and seeing you like this makes all of us really upset! But you're still sitting there in your own little universe thinking that nobody loves you, no body cares about you, you're all alone, boo-hoo. Well whether you like it or not, _I_ love you, and it hurts to see you feeling like this!"

"What would you possibly know about love, Yuffie? You shouldn't talk about it if you don't know much about it."

"Stop telling me that! It makes me feel so childish!"

"That's because you're _being_ childish."

"So are you! You keep talking all about you, you, you, and you don't seem to grasp that you are _not_ alone in the slightest but you continue to think that you are!"

_"I lost everybody! I lost the one person that I ever loved! You can't say you understand any of this because you don't and you never will!"_ He panted.

"You lost the one person you loved, huh?" Yuffie said. She licked her lips and nodded slowly. "Uh-huh. So, she loved you back, right?"

"Of course she did."

"Well the one person I love _doesn't_ love me back. He never will. He's living in the past and he's so self-centered that he doesn't notice when other people care about him." She sniffled a little bit. "It hurts, you know. To know that you don't love me, that you won't _ever_ love me."

"How do you know that I don't love you?"

"How can you? You're always so mean to me. You act like I'm the last person on earth that you'd want to spend time with." She felt that familiar lump rising up in her throat again but she swallowed it. Now was not a good time to cry. She didn't want him to see her get teary. "You… you act like you absolutely hate me. You must wake up every morning and celebrate that you aren't me."

He did not answer, he only stared at her. He looked a little funny because he wasn't frowning or glaring or insulting her or anything. Finally, he said, "Yuffie, I _wish_ I was more like you."

"Oh, really?" She asked sarcastically. "And why is that? So you could laugh and insult and you wouldn't have to worry about me actually walking away and crying?"

"No, it's because you've come such a long way in such a short amount of time," he told her. The comment shocked her. "You've grown stronger, in a way that I don't think that I ever could."

_(()) No one ever lied straight to your face,_

_No one ever stabbed you in the back._

_You may think I'm happy,_

_But I'm not gonna be okay._

_Everybody always gave you what you wanted._

_You never had to work, it was always there._

_So you don't know what it's like…_

_What it's like… (())_

"Squall… I… I don't know what to say," she said, still in shock. Imagine—Squall being envious of her. What a concept. But she was skeptical. "You're not lying just to do something cruel to me, are you? I know you adore these sadist games sometimes."

"Yuffie, I may insult you and call you names that I know you don't like. I may make you do things that you hate doing, just to try to make you say no to me. I may be a colossal asshole more often than not, but I am not sadist. I would never fool with your head that way. What I said was true."

"So then you _do_ like me?"

"Yes, Yuffie, I do like you. Very much."

"Then how come you never _show it,_ huh?" She demanded, feeling mostly confused and a bit angry by this whole thing. "How come you're always so mean to me and telling me things that I damned well know aren't true?"

"I wanted you to stand up to me," he said quietly. "I wanted you to… be able to tell me that I was wrong. I know that you know that nothing I ever called you was true but I wanted for you to actually tell me that to my face." He sighed. "I could never want a woman who _can_ stand up for herself, but won't."

"Then why didn't you just _say something?"_ She threw her arms up as she started to pace back and forth. "Instead of just being mean to me all these years, why didn't you just tell me that I had to stand up for myself? That way I wouldn't live under the impression that you found me a repelling excuse for a human being?"

"I wanted you to stand up, specifically, to me," he explained. He didn't really want to go any further into this, but he had a feeling that Yuffie would stay on his back about it until he gave up and told her everything. He would try to get away with telling her as little as possible.

She stopped pacing and turned to face him. "Why you? Do you regard yourself that highly?"

"No, I wanted you to stand up to me… because I knew you liked me more than anybody else. I wanted you to be able to stand up to anyone, regardless of what you thought of them."

"You wanted me to be able to stand up to the man I loved?"

"Essentially, yes, I did."

_(()) To be hurt,_

_To be lost,_

_To be left out in the dark._

_To be kicked_

_When you're down._

_To feel like you've been pushed around._

_To be on the edge of breaking down,_

_And no one's there to save you._

_No, you don't know what it's like…_

_What it's like… (())_

"So your immediate solution was to insult me and make me actually start to believe that I was a worthless piece of shit, and all of it was part of your scheme to make me stand up for myself, which, incidentally I could do just fine without you making my self esteem stay somewhere around ground zero for the last six years."

"I'm sorry," he said. His voice was very quiet and he did not look at her. "I'm sorry for everything."

"What?" She wasn't sure if she had heard him properly. What was he apologizing for?

"I'm sorry. I… I never knew what I'd done. I just… wanted you to stand up for yourself. I wanted you to stand up to me. You looked at me as if I was some sort of a god, and I knew perfectly well that I wasn't one. I didn't want you role-modeling me so I had to make you want to stand up to me somehow—that was the only way I could think to do it." He put his face in his hands and sighed heavily.

Yuffie, too, sighed, but she was quieter. Neither of them moved for quite some time. Finally, she stirred and gently sat herself down next to him.

"You should have told me," she whispered.

"If you knew… then you wouldn't have had to stand up."

_(()) To be hurt,_

_To be lost,_

_To be left out in the dark._

_To be kicked_

_When you're down._

_To feel like you've been pushed around._

_To be on the edge of breaking down,_

_And no one's there to save you._

_No, you don't know what it's like._

_Welcome to my life. (())_

"We have to stay together, you know that right?" She said after a moment. "We're all each other has. But… it's better than nothing, right?"

He looked up slowly and nodded. "It is… infinitely better."

_(()) Welcome to my life._

_(()) Welcome to my life… (())_

0…0…0…0…0

Wow, this is longer than my standard-issue chapter! And it's a songfic chapter! Imagine that. I do hope you like it and if you have any suggestions, comments, or just praise, please review! I do plan on continuing this. My muse is on a songfic kick so you think that it would work on UB for me but the chapter I'm working on happens to NOT be a songfic chapter. Oh well… can't have everything! Please leave me a review!


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